Saturday, June 30, 2012

Under construction!!!

So this past week has been super crazy! I finished my portfolio and sent it in and finally finished all of our papers for the home study. On top of all that we are putting in new floors!!! The house has been all torn apart. We removed the bathroom carpets and replaced them with new laminate. And now we are removing the carpets, they will be replaced on Tuesday! Whew, I'm worn out just writing that!! We want our house to be just as beautiful as the baby we bring home!

We met with our social worker Friday. She is very laid back lady and has been through the adoption process her self twice. She went over the things we have to have and the questions she is going to ask us. The biggest question for us is, "who gets the baby, if something happens to us?" I don't know how to tell her that the list of who will want our baby and who will take care of him/her is a mile long!!! :) we have so many people in our lives that I know would be great with baby Day. Please pray for us as we make that decision. Our social worker also is going to work with us on finding a birth mother. Her agency has just started working with birth mom's and they don't have as many as GLAD does but it gives us a greater chance of getting a baby faster. Its kind of like we have two feet in two doors, which ever opens up first we will take. :)She will be at Our house for the second part if the home study on July 25th. Once this is completed we are ready to bring home our baby!

I recently bought a bassinet, swing and pack n play from a really good friend. She was getting ready to sell it and I thought it would go great in nursery. You have no idea how it felt bringing that home. I've dreamed of the day that baby stuff would fill our home and it's actually happening!! I cannot wait to watch my baby sleep and swing and play. It brings tears to my eyes to think of the happiness this child will bring.

As of right now we dont have a birth mon yet. But i still find myself thinking a lot about the her. At night when I can't sleep I just think about who she is, is she pregnant yet, is she scared, is she ok?? I pray for her every chance I get, she is the one who is holding my sweet baby for me and I want her to feel God's presence in her life. I want her to have peace and joy knowing giving up her baby will bring such joy to our life!! Please pray everyday for our birth mother, that she doesn't loose hope and that she has peace about her decision.

Dear Lord,
I pray right now for the women who is carrying my child. I pray that not matter her situation she will fill your presence all around her. If she is scared place your arms around her and know she is loved. Please keep her safe and guide her through her pregnancy. Thank you Lord for your miracles!

There will never be any way to thank everyone who has helped us these past few years! Your devotion to praying for Charlie and I is beyond amazing! I pray that God blesses each of you for what you've done for us!!!!

Thursday, June 21, 2012

May the baby we hold in our heart one day be in our arms!

Well after much prayer and consideration, Charlie and I have decided to adopt a sweet and deserving baby. We are currently on our way to becoming parents.

We are using an agency is Evansville called GLAD. They have been so amazing! I have spent so much time preparing a portfolio for the birth mother to look at. This will help her in her decision. We both had to write an autobiography and answer questions about our personalities and our childhood. Then I put lots of pictures of our family, our hobbies, our vacations, and our lifestyle. It was a lot of work but in the end it looked amazing and I was both proud and exhausted when I turned it in.

We meet with our social worker next Friday and turn in all of our paperwork which includes background checks, letters of reference( which by the way melted my heart from each person who wrote a letter for us) and financial information. After next Friday we will have a home study, which is the the part I dread the most. After all of this we will officially be ready for a baby.

I turned my application last Wednesday. On Thursday I revived a call from them that said a girl was coming in that afternoon and she wanted me to go ahead a write a birth mother letter and send in some pictures. She is due in August and wanted a family with no kids. I panicked, I quickly wrote a letter and sent in some pictures and in the end she didn't pick us. But this made me realize how I needed to get our pirtfolio in so the next one could possible pick us. It also made me realize just how real this is and how quickly our life could change. To be honest with you, I became so excited. To just think that I could be a mommy makes my heart melt.

I decided to continue our blog with our new journey in our fight for a baby. I know God will bless this journey as he has before. I am asking for your continued prayers for not only us but for our future baby and the birth mother. This will be a difficult decision for her and I pray that God puts her at peace with her choice.
I am also asking that if you know of anyone who is in a situation and doesn't want their baby that you think if us. Its very hard to get on here and ask that but I feel that if we don't ever ask we may never see what God can do. So please let us know of anybody who may be in this position.

Again I think you so much for all your love and support. Our baby will have so much love they won't know what to do with it all. God bless

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Summer fun and decision making!

Well it's been almost four months since our miscarriage and most days it feels like years. We have both enjoyed these past few months together and it has been enjoyable "not trying" to have a baby. We both needed this time to breath and reciprocate from the past few years!!!

But being the woman I am I'm still trying to figure out what's next. I've been praying for God to lead us in the right direction. I've gone over all our options and prayed over them and each day I change my mind on what to do next. All the while hoping we just get pregnant on our own. I realized over the past few months that all I really want is a baby, any way I can get it, even if it's not our DNA!

I feel like I've done very well dealing with the announcements of our friends who are expecting and I'm just hoping it will be our turn next! A few weeks ago there was a couple in our church that took in a baby that their family couldn't take care of. I just cried because I thought why can't someone just knock on our door with a baby. I realized then that I would take any baby I could get! Just to be a mommy!! I told Charlie maybe we should put out an ad out for anyone who knows someone who doesn't want their baby we will take it:))) as funny as it sounds it's the truth, we are sooo ready to be patents! ( yes, we will take any baby that nobody wants, but we do want it to be legal...just in case you read this and thought I would go all crazy and steal one....;))

So this brings me to my prayer requests. I am currently working on our application for adoption and at the same time I'm working on our application for a grant to help us pay for our transfer if our embryos. I feel like I should at least try both and see what God can do. We are along for prayers on both of these things. We will be happy either way God leads us but we want to go the way He wants us to. Please be praying for our embryos that we may or may not put in. Please pray for our possible baby that may be brought into our lives and for the mother who will give it to us! Lots of things to pray for I know but we will continue to PUSH until our prayers are answered or until God takes this desire out of my heart. And right now the desire is in there do far I'm bursting with joy at the possibility to be a mommy!!!!

Thank you got your continued prayers for Charlie and I as we continue to do Gods will and bring Him all the glory!!!!

"for I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord......."